Vroom vroom

A new chapter of my life is about to begin.

I will be busier, crazier, more tired, and hopefully richer in a year's time.

But for now, I am short of sleep (even more so than previously), on edge, very confused, very apprehensive, very unsure of myself, and very unwilling to break out of my comfort zone.

But when the tide goes out, the waves push you along, and you are drawn by the current. And you go.

Still Learning

There's so much I'd like to do with my blog, but I'm still trying to find my way around the Mac OS. And I've forgotten all my HTML. I'd like to go read up about it, but there's barely time these days to even check my mails and do administration.

So what the template was, the blog still is. And the links at the side are still "empty". Only 3 people know about it, and of these 3, only ONE visits, hahaha. But yet I have no guts to advertise it in my posts to my mailing lists.

Oh well, it doesn't matter. Let it grow slowly. If at all. If it doesn't, only me and my visitor will know. Hahaha.

Time to get another digicam

I dropped my Olympus about a month ago, and I guess it's died.

AND I'VE GOT LOTS OF PHOTOS STILL STUCK IN MY MEMORY CARD! HOW TO READ THEM NOW???

Hubby says nobody repairs cams these days, better to get another one, but since we've had some heavy expenses recently, so this has to wait.

I'm afraid I'll forget when I took boyby's photos, down to which month and how old he was.
Oh the adoring mom and her ADORABLE baby.

Never been in the same boat

My mom urged me to nurse my girl again yesterday.

She spoke in a roundabout way, "ask your mommy to give you some milk again, so you won't fall sick so easily" and I told her that she (girl) doesn't want to drink (I meant ebm). Whereupon Mom insisted that it was I who refused to nurse.

Explanations of angstiness, irritation during tandem nursing didn't help. "What's so difficult? Breastfeed two is the same as breastfeed one what."

No it is not. I felt terrible whenever I nursed her in the last few months. She wouldn't understand.

"Your dajie (elder sis) was also breastfeeding after you were born what. I didn't feel any irritation."

Well, there you have it. YOU didn't go through what I did. How would you be able to empathise?

Anyway I ended the discussion by asking my girl whether she remembered. "Yes, Mommy, I know it was very irritating for you, and that's why I can drink fresh (cow's) milk."

Isn't she sweet?

Nappies and Moms

The last time I went to Spotlight I got some of this marvellous baby muslin, which is essentially the same as our traditional cloth nappies, except they came in lovely pastelly pink, blue, yellow and green. My plan was to turn them into hankies for the kids, because this material is pretty absorbent, yet still soft and light. So far they're looking good, despite my lousy sewing skills and of course, my machine's perpetual tension problem.

While I was hemming away yesterday, I began to wonder whether the kids would ever have to face any awkward questions along the lines of "Where did you get those horrible cheapskate hankies?" or "Are you so poor that your mom has to cut up yr old nappies to make hankies for you?". What would they say? Would they have the sense to give a respectable answer? Or would they just speechlessly shake their heads? Most importantly, would they understand that their mom made these hankies for them simply because
1) she loved them and wanted to sew them something and
2) these hankies are perfectly suited for their use (or as we say in Sg, cheap and good)?

I tried putting myself in that situation, and I figure there is a very high chance I would say something to insult my own mother. Well, not the me as I am now, but in my younger days. Honestly I am very ashamed of myself for not appreciating my mom more. I've always taken her for granted (still do, although I am TRYING to respect and appreciate her), insulted her a lot over the years for her mistakes, and generally not been doing what the Bible tells me to do (honour your parents). If she were to hear some of the things I've said about her behind her back, I think she has very good cause to disown me. Well, I'm trying to change. Now that I'm a mother, I finally begin to see what she went through to bring me up, despite our not being together most of the time (I lived with my paternal grandma will P1).

Thankfully, God has allowed me to realise the error of my ways in her living days, and a chance to make up to her. I try not to repeat my mistakes, try to set a good example for my children. After all, monkey see, monkey do. Truly I say to you.

p.s. my daughter loves that story about the monkeys and the caps. and today she told me mickey mouse makes this sound when he eats, "gh gh gh ching! gh gh gh gh ching!" AND she said this was what her aunt told her. ??!!